Join the campaign: Justeece for Deek!

Some Celtic fans may think that all the energies of players, coaching staff, suits and supporters should be directed at struggling to revive feint hope of winning the SPL. But thank Hibernian for words of sense from Derek Riordan.

Many Celtic fans will have found it difficult to wipe away the tears sufficiently to read Moira Gordon’s exclusive interview in which Deek “opened his heart on his Celtic hell”.

The young Celtic star is clearly now a more refined, mature man than the immigrant-abuser whose youthful high-jinks ruffled the feathers of former Hearts man Rudi Skacel.

So when Riordan makes oblique calls for the sacking of Gordon Strachan, it would be foolish not to listen.

Deek SLAMMED Strachan for only relying on him as a phantom goalscorer!

"I only get chucked on if we need a goal so he must think I can get him a goal but he obviously doesn't want to do it unless he really has to because he doesn't want me to prove him wrong.”

He also RAPPED his under-fire gaffer for refusing to rely on Rior-daldo, as terrified Celtic defenders have dubbed the agile assassin: “He knows I would score quite a lot if he played me as much as he has played the other strikers but I don't think he wants proved wrong.”

Mara-Deeka SCOFFED at the Ginger Whinger’s false pleasantries that have added to the young Celtic ambassador’s pain: "When I speak to him, he's nice to me and says all the things players want to hear about me being part of the plans but you know by his actions that he's talking rubbish.”

Rio REVEALED he has GIVEN UP – a revealing revelation that will rock Celtic fans who had been unaware of his revelatory rocket: "It is frustrating. I was left out the squad [against Motherwell] and was training with the reserves on Friday. I've virtually chucked it at Celtic, what's the point when I'm not getting a chance."

Clearly hurting, Deek spoke of not being allowed out to play with his pals:
"I went there thinking I was going to play. It's not like I just went there for the money, I wanted to play and I thought I would do well at Celtic with the amount of chances that teams like Celtic and Rangers create.”

“I thought I would score a lot of goals and if I was given the chance every week I still believe I could. But I've just never had the chance." Though he is too LOYAL to say so, the young striker subtly hints that he believes Strachan is afraid of being PROVED WRONG by cashing in on the barrow-load of goals at his twinkle-toetips.

The journalist he spoke to also implied that he had been TIED UP, describing him as “a player at the end of his tether”, and revealed that being CHUCKED ON as a last minute sub against Hibernian was tantamount to PHYSICAL ABUSE: "That was a kick in the teeth. That was embarrassing. I did well when I was there and some of the Hibs fans said I shouldn't go, so that was embarrassing, but it's always the same, it's the last few minutes if I do get chucked on. [When his manager needs a goal and believes Deek can score a goal but doesn’t want a goal so doesn’t chuck him on]."

Modest Deek recalls the GLORY DAYS at Easter Road: “I'm not being big-headed but I was one of the WELL-KNOWN ONES at Hibs because I was doing so well and scoring so many goals but now you see all of them, they are the ones who are playing every week and in the Scotland squads and it's annoying. Depressing [So it is].”

Deek reveals he feels LET DOWN by the manager: "I feel let down by the manager”.

And in another revelatory revelation, talks of the hospitality of his mum (who he will neither confirm nor deny gave TEA AND BISCUITS to Gutless Gordon: “I remember him sitting in my mum's house trying to sign me and he said I could play anywhere in his midfield or up front. It was the same in the press conferences but now I can only play left midfield for some reason and that's not even my best position.”

The Peely-Wally Pele though echoed SIR ALAN SUGAR, issuing a chilling “YOU’RE FIRED” warning for Strachan, predicting: "I'll see who the next manager is before I decide. I don't want to be here and not playing but I would like to stay at Celtic if I thought I had a chance to play. I know I won't get that chance with him. I've been here nearly two years and it's not happened yet so I don't see it happening now. But Celtic are brilliant. I like it here and would love to prove myself but the NASTY thing is not playing."

“They were saying 'you should be out there playing' and that helps. The Celtic fans have been brilliant. They know something is not right. They are the only people I will thank at Celtic if I leave."

Messi-Heid, as he has been affectionately dubbed, also took the chance to set the record straight:

“There have been loads of rumours, I'm supposed to have SLEPT with his daughter or sister or PUNCHED HIM ON THE TRAINING GROUND but they are all a load of RUBBISH. There's nothing that I can think of I've done wrong to him. There's been no bust ups. I don't know what his problem is with me."

But Deek’s not wasting his time as a Celtic outcast. While his team stuttered to a home defeat on Satruday, life-long Celtic Riordan was away “getting his hair cut”, scotching rumours that he does that job on his own.

Celt fans are sure to react with fury at the shabby treatment of one of Europe's most talented non-playing superstars. An insider reveals that Celtic suits are chilled with memories of the four-man protest that followed Billy McNeill CHUCKING ON Joe Miller and then WHEECHING him off again.

If you wish to join the Justeece for Deek! campaign, please sign below.

• Stop sobbing, Deek